What’s Great About Today

Have you ever felt like nothing can go right, one “bad” thing happens after another, and you just can’t catch a break?

Lately I have fallen into that trap…

And I’m starting to take it personal.

I can’t help but wonder why nothing seems to “go our way.”

I’ve even gone as far as asking, “What did we do to deserve this?”

Welcome to my pity party. It’s not a fun place to be.

You know…the SUV needs all new ($1,000) tires, all the windows in said SUV refuse to roll up at the same time, a huge business deal falls through, you get sick and rack up an ungodly ER bill…

None of it is earth shattering, or life-ending, or tragic.

And my husband and I find ourselves constantly saying, “It could always be worse.”

And it could. We don’t need a reminder of that. We hear of horrible things happening around us every day.

We know our life is good. Great. Ideal.

I’m not here to compare troubles.

As always, I’m here to try and learn something.

And I’m just not happy with, “It could always be worse” as the lesson.

So, then what am I supposed to be learning from all this?

How to be more patient? How to live simply? How to be frugal? How to appreciate the small things?

I’m starting to think the lesson is how to focus on what is already good rather than what “could be worse.”

I know you’re thinking, How perfect and cheery and pleasant!

Well, it’s not as easy as it sounds. A few weeks ago I asked my mother-in-law to borrow the book, One Thousand Gifts. I was determined to “dare to live fully right were you are” as the cover promises.

I read the first ten pages and had to stop due to uncontrollable crying.

Okay, maybe I’m not ready for this lesson yet. 

After my poor hubby accidentally backed into someone’s car in the bank parking lot today, we started questioning things again. Not sure if I was ready to revisit the-book-that-made-me-cry, tonight I serendipitously came across this article which invites us to ask, “Do you know what’s great about that?” every time a challenge arises.

The car needs all new tires! You know what’s great about that? It will be super-safe and easy to drive once we have them!

My outlook  finally started to change and just when it seemed like one more “bad” thing had happened to us, I remembered to ask, “Do you know what was great about today?”

And I had the best possible answer.

We got to witness the miracle of life today.

We got to see our daughter’s beautiful face for the first time.

We got to hear her healthy heartbeat.

And we got to watch her stick her tongue out at us, as if to say, “How dare you need reminding of what is great about today!”

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I hope to push the tears aside and read more of One Thousand Gifts, start keeping a gratitude journal, and continue to ask, “What’s great about that?” when more challenges arise.

A helpful journal topic to explore this idea is making a cluster of your current gifts and challenges.

I’m excited to share this journey with you!

 

“I Can Do Anything Good!”

I think more of us should start our day this way…

“I can do anything good, I like my school, I like anything…I like my hair, I like my haircuts…I like my whole HOUSE!”

Happy Friday!

A Recovering Perfectionist

“I am a recovering perfectionist. Before, I experienced that I and everyone else was always falling short, that who we were and what we did was never quite good enough. I sat in judgment on life itself. Perfectionism is the belief that life is broken…Wholeness lies beyond perfection. The life within us is diminished by judgment….” — Dr. Naomi Remen

…It wasn’t until I became a mother that I realized perfectionism is always the enemy of love. By definition, perfectionism is judging ourselves, our loved ones, and life as not good enough. We reject the present moment — peanut butter hands, tear-stained face and all — in favor of some idealized image that can never be real. We hold ourselves back from really loving, because how can you love while you’re judging? We think once we lose weight, our child gets through this phase, and our spouse gets a raise, our real life will start. But as John Lennon once said, “Life is what happens to you while you’re busy making other plans…” 

-from Daily Inspirations for Parents by Dr. Laura Markham

I’ve always been a perfectionist and while I know it’s not exactly healthy, I never thought about just how hurtful it can be until becoming a parent.

When I think of these lines in the context of my life as a mother the message is finally clear.

Perfectionism is the belief that life is broken.

How can I be “okay” with being a perfectionist with that definition?

I know that this life is anything but broken.

My need for everything to be “perfect” is actually me judging myself, my loved ones, and my life as not good enough.

I know that my loved ones are more than good enough. My life is more than good enough. And yes, even, my SELF is more than good enough.

We reject the present moment – peanut butter hands, tear-stained face and all – in favor of some idealized image that can never be real.

My goal for this blog, and this life, is to learn to “live in the moment and make it beautiful”—no matter how ugly, hard, or imperfect.

How dare I reject a moment with my child for not being pretty, or perfect enough?

We hold ourselves back from really loving, because how can you love while you’re judging

Why should I hold myself back from loving…

myself, my loved ones, my life

100%?

***

Let this be a reminder.

***

Baby Bump…Week 28

Here is the latest in my pregnancy diary….

How Far Along: 28 weeks (7 months)
Maternity Clothes? I can still fit into most of my stretchy pants, and baggy shirts, but have to wear maternity clothes for the most part. It’s starting to get warm so I’m wearing lots of tank tops and comfy pants!
Stretch Marks: Not yet!
Sleep: I’m still pretty comfortable except for the constant bathroom breaks.
Best Moment this Week: Passing my glucose test!
Miss Anything: I still really miss not having to go to the bathroom every 5 minutes. I feel like the bathroom breaks are much worse the 2nd time around!
Movement: I’m finally feeling more movement on the outside, but not actual kicks.  It seems like this baby is already way more calm and relaxed than AJH has ever been!
Food Cravings: I am craving cold things…ice cream, sherbert, popsicles.
Anything Making You Queasy or Sick: Nope!
Gender: A girl
Labor Signs: N/A
Symptoms: Besides going to the bathroom every five minutes, I’m still pretty short of breath, even when sitting completely still! I think it has something to do with the way the baby is positioned and your body needing more oxygen during pregnancy.
Belly Button in or out? In and completely stretched out…it scares my hubby!
Wedding rings on or off? On
Happy or Moody most of the time: Happy
Looking forward to: Our 3D ultrasound next week!

Stay tuned for more details in a few weeks!

This is What We Do #2

This is what we do…

We do shoes. And we do gymnastics. Not just gymnastics, but gymnastics in Hannah Montana leotards and Puma warm-ups.

We do dress-up. In baby carriages. While wearing Hannah Montana leotards.

We do high heels with nightgowns. Oh, my!

We do tree hugging. In Ruby slippers.

We do dress-up and dance. We do dress-up and deep thoughts.

We do dress-up with hats. We do dress-up with tears.

We do dirt. Planting. Gardens.

We do road trips to Hokie Country.

We do photo shoots with fake flowers.

And we do…

…this.

Don’t ask!

Always Read the Bottle

I’ve been letting my daughter rub this “lotion” all over my legs and arms for the past month…

I think my mom left it at our house so I didn’t know exactly what it was, and just assumed it was this new, amazingly soft lotion.

AJH found it and decided to rub it all over me when she saw I was peeling after our beach trip. I thought that was very nice and helpful of her so I happily obliged.

It wasn’t until today that I actually read the bottle…

Oops.

No wonder it wasn’t working.

At least what hair I have on my arms and legs won’t be “frizzy.”

Turquoise Corner

I love this little turquoise chair and thought you would, too.

I picked it up randomly last fall from an antique booth at MaDee’s Market.

(If you’re interested in being a vendor at the market this fall, get more info. here. It’s a great cause!)

The awesome color and very attractive price tag caught my eye as I was literally walking out the door and I’m so glad I stopped to get it! Turquoise is my favorite color and I’ve enjoyed collecting bits and pieces in that shade to sprinkle around the house over the years.

I (more like my husband) didn’t think we had room for one.more.thing. but now that I put my cute little chair in this corner of our living room, I can’t imagine it NOT being there.

I’m really liking how it covers those unsightly cords.

It used to bother me that the color of the chair is not the exact same as the dresser, but I’m starting to embrace the ability to mix multiple shades of the same color rather than be too “matchy-matchy.”

What do you think?

Maternity Fashion

Dressing a baby bump can actually be fun sometimes!

(though you may not think that if you saw the blue, men’s tee shirt and un-matching blue and Hawaiian print pajama pants I am wearing right now).

Here is one of my favorite recent outfits…

(Excuse my creepy lack of  eye contact).

This is an old, black shirt from T.J. Maxx tucked into a vintage skirt from my favorite antique store paired with some old flats from Gap. This has always been one of my favorite skirts and I’m glad I could get some wear out of it during the pregnancy.

You can follow some of my favorite maternity fashions on Pinterest here.

Do you have a favorite maternity store or pregnant fashion icon? Share it with me!

Dear AJH: 26 Months

Dear AJH,

I haven’t done a great job at keeping up with a “real” baby book or scrapbook for you and when I say “great job” I really mean that I haven’t filled out one page in the many baby books I have collected since before you were born (even the really expensive one from Pottery Barn).

But don’t fear…over the past 2 years I’ve been fairly consistent with updating your daily life in words and pictures on this site and I’ve decided I’m okay with this blog being your baby book…I can even turn it into a real book and have it printed out for us to look through over the years, which I’ve already done once after you turned one.

I’d love to do more posts like this one–with intentional, and informative “letters” to you…though I find it hard to put all of my deepest and most true feelings toward you into a place so public. I might just stick with the facts for now, but I think you’ll be okay with that.

(If all else fails, I’ve heard you can even turn your Facebook status updates and pictures into a book, and goodness knows I’ve done a GREAT job of keeping up with that!)

I love you and here is what you’ve been up to at 2 years and almost 2 months:

-You are currently requesting “Peace Like a River” and “You Are My Sunshine” for your night-time lullabies. Daddy sang “Peace Like a River” to you one time and you were hooked…now mommy needs to learn all the words! It was one of your Papa’s favorite songs and every time we sing it we think of him!

-You are talking up a storm, just like your mama. Also like your mama, you like to plan everything out loud and make sure everything is “straight” in your head, such as,”Tomorrow is ‘nastics, and then Wed. is ‘cucic’ (music class) with Mason,” and “Daddy is driving, mommy is riding, Annalee sit back here, Granny coming, Pops coming, Molly coming,” etc.

-Speaking of ‘nastics…you just started your first tumbling class and love it. You seem very “at home” in the gym, and I think you even have the build of a little gymnast. I can see lots of time there in your future!

-Your hair is still blonde with little curls in the back, which are enhanced by the humidity. We can fit the back into a little ponytail or “sprout” or the sides into two pigtails.

-You also still love b-ball and enjoy cheering daddy on at his games and asking to “shoot hoops.”

-Trying on, playing with and organizing your many pairs of shoes (most given to you from your cousin) will keep you occupied for quite some time. You also change clothes about 10 times a day and love picking out your outfits and saying things like, “This matches, this doesn’t match. This is too big and this is too small.”

-You have just started playing independently in the past few weeks. It’s so fun to watch you feed your babies, put them down for “night night,” make things with play dough, and sing along to your karaoke machine.

-You still pray for “Hokie” and “Abby” every night, and tonight you also added “‘nastics” and “jump up and down” to your list of prayers.

-Your favorite foods right now are probably french fries, yogurt and spaghetti.

-Your current obsession is a German cartoon you found on You Tube and refer to as “Dolls.” You ask to watch “Dolls” about 100 times a day and have already started to memorize the songs…in German. You also love watching videos of babies, firetrucks, and Caillou.

You are truly one-of-a-kind,

Love, Mommy

 

This is What We Do #1

If you ever wonder what us stay-at-home-slash-work-at-home moms of toddlers do all day…

…here is a little glimpse into our world…

We play dress-up. Lots and lots of dress-up.

Most days it involves some form of princess gear, high-heels and cowboy boots.

When it rains, we go out and feel the raindrops…

And after the rain we go for walks in search of mud puddles…

…and horses.

And when we get stir crazy…

…we go see the airplanes.

These are some of the fun moments of the week. I left out the tears and temper tantrums and typical two-year old tirades.

Maybe I’ll show you some of those next week!